Sid Contemplates Nancy's Death in a Limousine

      "Leave off life awhile. It's overrated.
      Nancy, you blue eyes toward death, as if toward
      Another shore whose beating sands were war-drums
      Marching you out of life and sense-- and love;
5     For I had loved you. Together we'd poured
      Each hourglass with centuries-- to the crest!
      And now, insensible and languid
      And any milky tear, I watch awash
      These blank solemnities and joyless vigours
10    Strut their little glittering while before me,
      Prating: I am life! I am alive! Alive,--
      Has not a salamander's tail, disjointed
      from the sleek head, and fidgeting in the hard palm
      Like threads of fire, as much claim upon
15    The grounds of self-animation as these
      Who clamor ecstacies? The quiet nun
      Or quaker staring walls down in her church
      Commands vibrant meditations in a breath
      Unbreathed; voiceless, and without even
20    So much as an eyelid's unconscious stir
      That might annoy a flea, the devotee
      Whirls the cosmos round her like a cloak
      Invisible, and the kneeling stars in choir
      Warm her hush contemplation, those white maids
25    Stirred to comfort an unmoving central calm.
      And so, to cut short the dogs' whining yip
      And defoliate the grievy wreath of death
      Before its planted, blackly ribboned,
      Above my Nancy's unuttering grave
30    And avoid the choked yodeling condolences
      (Almost worse than the shrived chastisement
      Of my sense!) and dolorous crowds of mourners
      Stamping passports out of my private grief
      For a photo-op of mourning stardom,
35    I'll pack myself into a holy cloister,
      Eschew the tasteless ornaments of this world,
      Revile in silence the thousand hands
      Excited to touch, or anxious to please,
      Holding nothing but their wanting of me,
40    Discard the thin sensuality of flesh
      Poor in variety, lost in having,
      And in saving spent, whereby we each
      Mock ourselves in choosing one above another,
      Exiled from all this aping mockery
45    And saved in being lost, found in being saved,
      I'll quit this exchange of jibes, this commerce,
      This weary commerce of weak weary souls,
      Primping worn attitudes in new attire
      And withdraw as the widowed spider
50    To her pall, mourning-gorged, defeat inflicted,
      Damaged in spirit and in sense maligned,
      Grim in prayer to the godless absolutes,
      Nature's cheating majesty that cannot cease with us
      And that way pay love. Drive on, drive on."

 

From the collection "Hymns"

Written by Gregg Glory [Gregg G. Brown]

More information available on gregglory.com.